Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Taking Some Time To Pray

I really need to take some time to pray about how to continue my story. I don't want it to be about detail after detail. Although, the point of my writing it this way, so far, has been to show the emotion and heartache I felt. Some of those people I have come across have the idea that I didn't spend many nights in tears, filled with overwhelming grief. Questions after questions! I questioned myself; I questioned God.

My story needs to be a testimony...I know this. BUT I don't want it to be about letting everyone into all the details of my life.  I want it to minister to someone. I want it to touch those DEEP areas of your heart that make you say..."Wow, I can work on my marriage, even through the pain!"  I can go through pain and still survive.  When I do continue I believe you will see how much my dependece on God grew. How my only way to cope through even the daily things was because of God's love surrounding me.

My need to protect my husband still runs deep.  I have never shared EVERYTHING that has happened with everyone, and I probably won't.  Even Josh read some of this stuff and he remembers only some.  It's amazing what the devil can do to our hearts as we allow him to take over. He deafens our ears!  Please keep me in your prayers as I hear God's voice on how to really continue.

2 comments:

Tamera - aka TJ said...

Oh Serena, I think you are doing a great job with your story, and I'm so impressed that Josh let you tell it. This is huge for him.
It is wonderful that you working to be honorable and that your story is told only for the reason of giving glory to God and only to help others.
I understand you not telling all the details. I will probably never tell all the details of what Dave and I have gone through, for the same reason that you won't - Honor and Protection. How wonderful our God is when we obey Him and make sure to brin HIM honor by honoring our husbands.
Praying God gives you the right words as you continue.

Rebecca said...

I think it's very brave of you to share your testimony. Behind every marriage is a story. Some are happy, some are sad, & some are there so we can see that others have been through the fire & survived.
Your heart is in the right place. If we all shared our stories maybe we could all learn & grow from each other.
I draw courage from your story.
Maybe I'll sit down & write about the trials that Jer & I have gone through.
Keep writing. You have inspired me!!
Love you Serena & I am praying God's hand & wisdom on you!!!